In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
