Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize