My brain says no but my pants say off.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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