Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
