Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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