how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
