There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
4 words: hood of his car
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
