He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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