the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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