MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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