Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize