Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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