Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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