it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
