Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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