You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
