bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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