I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
