am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
