saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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