its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
