yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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