I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
