Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
