Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
