All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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