that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
