Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
