Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
