i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
