I can tuck mytits in my pants
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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