Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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