physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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