How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
