that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
