PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
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