I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
