Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Randomize
