I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
