Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
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