oh god the rape fog is back!
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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