I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
