school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize