I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
