can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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