Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
