jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Text me some of your sweat
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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