Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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