He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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