Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize